ranting

people tell me that i have TOO much patience. especially my best friend. she wants me to yell at a couple of ppl. . . namely brian, kason, and my family. i keep letting them hurt me, and i keep putting up with their crap and i always give people the benefit of the doubt. . . . and Mckel thinks that is a bad thing. i'm kind of sick of her telling me all of these things that are wrong with me. whenever i just want to chill and relax then she shoves this piece of paper that she has written on that says "The number one rule is. . . DON'T BE BORING!" it gets pretty old sometimes. she has a double standard for her and everyone else. its ok for her to do things, but it isn't ok for other people to do them. . . for example: at the beginning of the year i used my alarm clock for about three days before she was so mad at me for having it that i decided it was just easier to put it away. i can compromise, if it bugs her then i won't use it anymore. no biggie. but then later she wants to borrow it. i'm thinking its only for a day or so. no, no. she's been using it the whole semester. it is way loud and annoying, and she lets it go and go and go and GO. the whole apt is annoyed with her. . . but she doesn't care, she doesn't have the willpower to get up in the mornings so she doesn't care that it wakes everyone else up on their sleep in days. her first class is at ten. . . how is it so hard to wake up at ten? my earliest class is eight, except for my sleep in days which is at nine. the alarm is set to go off at earlier than eight though. so the stupid thing goes for over two hours. rude much? she likes it to be freezing in our room, i like it to be warm. i tried and compromised with her, but now that there is snow on the ground, i'm sick, i can't sleep with it being so cold, and finals are coming up, i need sleep. we've gone over the whole window thing a couple of times, but this time i just told her that i couldn't deal with it, it needed to be closed. our roomie that lives in the room next to us is way cold too. mckel says i have to much patience with rude ppl, but she doesn't realize that she is one of those people. she is so mad at me, she won't talk, which is pretty lame to me. oh well. ugh. all she ever tells me is criticism, and thats all i ever hear from anyone. i used to think i was a nice person, but now i'm not so sure. brian and mckel keep telling me how some of the things i say aren't so nice. since when is honesty not nice? i try and say things in a nice way, and i really think about others feelings, but i guess its not as much as i should. oh geez. i'm so stressed about everything, and all my friends are being babies. ok, so not all of them, just my close friends. sometimes i feel like i have to take care of everyone, especially mckel. its not very fair. . . but i know what i'm going to do. i'm going to keep on being there for them, listening, helping, comforting, boosting, whatever. cause thats what i do. i don't care waht they say, i am a nice person. everyone has their moments, but i am a nice person. ppl are just so contradictory. mckel says i'm too nice and too patient, and i let ppl get away with things, but then again she turns around and says that sometimes the way i say things isn't that great. what am i supposed to do? stop being myself? i don't even know who i am anymore. everyone has puled me so far out of wack that i don't know what to do, where to go, or who i am. i'm so glad there is a break coming up. i need to do some serious self reflecting. ugh. finals. yuck.

Kidnapped | Radio Script

AMBIENCE: PIPES DRIPPING AND SCURRYING OF RODENTS.
Bruce: We dropped the ransom note like planned, we got the girl like planned, everything is going according to plan.
Kyle: I know, I know. But just because everything is working out the way we planned doesn’t mean that things can’t go wrong later.
Bruce: Don’t worry Kyle, I’m handling everything. You’ve been nervous about this from the beginning. Don’t worry, no one is gonna get hurt, and we’re not gonna get busted. Chill man.
Kyle: I’m holding you to that Bruce, nobody better get hurt.
Bruce: We talked about this; we’ve got everything under control. Why don’t you go check on the girl?
Kyle: Alright.
SOUND EFFECT: FOOTSTEPS ON CREAKY WOODEN FLOOR MUFFLED BY DUST. UNLOCKING OF A DOOR, DOOR CREAKING OPEN.
Kyle: Cordelia?
Cordelia: What do you want?
Kyle: Nothing, I’m just checking to see if you’re ok.
Cordelia: If I’m ok? If I’m ok? Why the hell would you care if I’m ok or not? You grabbed me outside of my dorm, shoved me into a van where you tied me up and gagged me, dragged me into this abandoned warehouse, and then locked me into this dingy, dirty room with no windows, a musty bed, and rat droppings everywhere. You kidnapped me, and now you are asking me if I’m ok? Are you kidding me? Of course I’m not ok! I don’t know who you are, what you are planning to do with me. Do you really think I’d be ok at all?
Kyle: I’m sorry, I know this isn’t easy for you, and I know you are scared. I’m just trying to ease your mind a little. You aren’t here alone. All we want from you is the money your father is going to pay when we ransom you. We aren’t going to hurt you unless you force us to. If you cooperate with me, things will go a lot smoother-for everyone involved.
Cordelia: So you expect me to be a good girl and do what you want? You honestly don’t think that I might have a problem with that? I don’t want to be here. I don’t even know where here is. I just want to go home.
Kyle: Well if you try to go home then there is gonna be a huge problem. Don’t mistake my kindness and sympathy as a weakness. Feel lucky I’m being nice cause my buddy Bruce, he isn’t nice-at all. So a word of advice, don’t piss him off. This is gonna be hard enough on you, don’t you want a friend?
Cordelia: You want to be my friend? Is that even remotely possible?
Kyle: I know we can’t be friends, but I don’t want this to be any harder on you than necessary. Cordelia: So you are trying to be nice to me? That’s a little hard to believe under the circumstances.
Kyle: Believe what you want, it’s up to you. That’s the only thing that is up to you. Everything else is up to Bruce and me.
SOUND EFFECTS: DOOR SLAMMING, BEING LOCKED, FOOTSTEPS FADING AWAY AND GIRLS MUFFLED SOBS.
Bruce: How’s she doin?
Kyle: She is scared out of her mind, and she’s trying not to let it show.
Bruce: She give you attitude?
Kyle: A little bit, but nothing to worry about.
Bruce: Why don’t you let me decide what we should or shouldn’t worry about. She has to be afraid of you or else she’s gonna do something stupid that’s gonna get her hurt. You wouldn’t want that to happen now would you?
Kyle: Look, Bruce man, its all good. She’s afraid, trust me, she is terrified. She isn’t gonna do anything stupid.
Bruce: You better be right about that or else it’s your butt on the line.
Kyle: I know, so when do we contact Cordelia’s parents? Hasn’t it been long enough? We kept her locked up in that room for a couple of hours before ya had me go check on her.
Bruce: I was just waiting for you before I made the call.
SOUND EFFECTS: CELL PHONE FLIPPING OPEN, NUMBER BEING DIALED.
Father: (ON PHONE) Hello? Hello? Cordy?!
Bruce: (ON PHONE WITH A VOICE DISGUISER) Is this Mr. Anderson, Cordelia’s Father?
Father: Yes, yes it is, just please, tell me what you want.
Bruce: I assume you got my note?
Father: Yes, I did, and I’ve done exactly what you told me to do. I haven’t called the cops, just please, is Cordy ok? Can, Can I talk to her?
Bruce: Good. You better not involve the cops or else you will never see your daughter again. Now, are you listening closely?
Father: Yes, yes I am, tell me what you want from me.
Bruce: I’ve done some research on you Mr. Samuel Anderson. You are quite the businessman. As of right now you have over 80,000 dollars in your bank account. It won’t be difficult for you to get 100,000 dollars cash.
Father: Ok, I can do that. Anything for Cordy.
Bruce: Good. You will get the cash by 9:00 p.m. tomorrow night. At 11:00 p.m. you will deposit an unmarked black gym bag into a cardboard box that will be sitting by a park bench in the city park. You will then drive back home and stay there until you receive my call saying that I have gotten the money.
Father: Wait, how do I know that once you get the money you aren’t going to just kill Cordy? What guarantee do I have that I am ever going to see my daughter ever again?
Bruce: Mr. Anderson, you aren’t in a position to be making any sorts of demands. Your daughter’s life is in my hands. Are you really going to take that chance? I give you my word that she won’t be harmed as long as you do exactly as I say.
Father: Just don’t hurt her! I’ll do whatever you say, just don’t hurt my Cordy.
Bruce: Then be ready with the cash Mr. Anderson, your daughter’s life is depending on you.
SOUND EFFECTS: PHONE BEING CUT OFF-TURNED OFF.
Kyle: Dude, Bruce. . .
Bruce: What? You got a problem man?
Kyle: No, no problem.
Bruce: That’s what I thought.
Kyle: I’m gonna go check on Cordelia and let her know that her father is going to pay the ransom so she will be home soon.
SOUND EFFECTS: BRUCE MUTTERING SOMETHING UNDER HIS BREATH, FOOTSTEPS, DOOR OPENING.
Cordelia: Hello?
Kyle: It’s me Cordelia. Bruce just got off the phone with your dad.
Cordelia: Is there any way that I can talk to my dad? How is he-
Kyle: He agreed to pay the ransom, so you will be able to go home as soon as we get the money.
Cordelia: When will I be able to go home?
Kyle: Soon. That’s all you need to know.
Cordelia: But you are going to let me go home when you get the money right?
Kyle: Of course we will Cordy.
Cordelia: Don’t use that name. Only my family and friends can use that name.
Kyle: Sorry, I thought that it would make you feel more comfortable.
Cordelia: How did you get into this? You don’t seem like the type of person who kidnaps another human being.
Kyle: It’s none of your business.
Cordelia: Look, I have nothing else to do; I’ve been alone in this room forever. The only thing that I have to do is listen to the rats run around here and hope that they don’t get anywhere close to me. Please, tell me. I could use the distraction. Please Kyle?
Kyle: Alright. But if you tell Bruce that I told you any of this, you seriously will get hurt.
Cordelia: I promise, I won’t tell him.
Kyle: Well, my younger brother got into some trouble and he got put in jail. My family doesn’t have enough money to bail him out. Bruce is my brother’s friend, he said that he would get a lawyer and take care of my brother if I helped him with this. This is the only way that I can afford to get my brother out of jail for something he didn’t do. Bruce has his own motives for wanting the money, and I really don’t want to know what they are.
Cordelia: How do you know that Bruce isn’t going to stab you in the back when all of this is over? Can you really trust him?
Kyle: I don’t trust him at all, but he is the only chance I have of getting my brother out of jail. I’m going to do whatever it takes to get him out.
Cordelia: How do you know he is innocent?
Kyle: I know my brother. I know that he would never do what they are accusing him of.
Bruce: Hey Kyle, what ya doin back there?
Kyle: Crap, I gotta go. I’ll try and check on ya in a little while.
Cordelia: Thanks Kyle.
Kyle: Yeah. Hey listen, I really am sorry about all of this. If there is anything that I can do for you, let me know. I wish that I didn’t have to do this, and that you didn’t have to be here, but I gotta do what I gotta do.
SOUND EFFECTS: DOOR CLOSES AND IS LOCKED. QUICK FOOTSTEPS FADE AWAY.
Bruce: What’s your prob man?
Kyle: Nothin.
Bruce: It doesn’t take that long to check on a chick. What took you so long?
Kyle: She needed a little reassurance that her dad was going to take care of things. She’s better now.
Bruce: I think you are a little too worried about what she is feeling. Don’t be such a bleeding heart. She is the key to your brother’s freedom, don’t forget that.
Kyle: I haven’t forgotten- there is no way I could forget. Hey, Bruce. . . I’ve been meaning to ask you. . . How did my brother get framed for beating up that woman and stealing her car? He would never do that.
Bruce: Don’t worry about it.
Kyle: I’m gonna worry about it, he’s my brother man.
Bruce: Just drop it alright.
Kyle: What are you not telling me Bruce?
Bruce: I said to drop it. So. Drop. It.
Kyle: Ya know what? Assaulting someone and stealing a car sounds like something you would do. Especially since you’ve done it before. I’m starting to think that it was you that did it and set my brother up.
Bruce: Oh please, why would I frame your brother?
Kyle: I don’t know, why you don’t you tell me. Why would you frame my brother?
Bruce: This is ridiculous, just focus on the job. Do what you need to do.
Kyle: Whatever man, I’m going to go check on Cordy.
Bruce: Oh, so it’s Cordy now huh? Not just the girl or Cordelia, you are calling her Cordy. The same name her dad used? Don’t you think you are getting a little too personal here?
Kyle: Don’t worry about me.
Bruce: I am worried. Why don’t you let me talk to her for a minute?
Kyle: I don’t think that’s such a good idea. I think she’s scared enough.
Bruce: Maybe. We’ll see.
SOUND EFFECTS: LOUD FOOTSTEPS, DOOR OPENING QUICKLY, WOMANS GASP.
Cordelia: Kyle?
Bruce: No babe, it’s the big boy Bruce.
Cordelia: Oh. . Where’s Kyle?
Bruce: He’s out for a little while. So it’s going to be just you and me. We can have some alone time, just for the two of us.
Cordelia: Alone?
Bruce: Yep. Just the two of us. I can think of a few things we can do to pass the time too.
Cordelia: When is Kyle coming back?
Bruce: Not for a long, long time. We have plenty of time, don’t you fret.
Cordelia: (YELLING) Kyle?!
Bruce: I said he was gone you slut.
Cordelia: (YELLING) Kyle?!
Kyle: Cordy? Are you ok in there?
SOUND EFFECTS: RUNNING FEET
Bruce: Stay out of this Kyle.
Kyle: What are you doin to her man? Look at her, she’s shaking and she’s white as a ghost! Bruce, I’m warning you, leave her alone. You’re on thin ice as it is.
Bruce: I’m on thin ice? I’m on thin ice? Don’t forget that I’m the one who is going to take care of your brother. You owe me.
Kyle: I’m starting to think that he wouldn’t be in jail if it wasn’t for you. I bet if I point the cops in the right place, they’ll be able to pin it on you. Don’t push me man.
Bruce: You wanna turn me in to the cops? Look where you are, you just kidnapped an eighteen year old college student, and you want to turn me into the cops? I got dirt on you, if I go down then so do you. Then where will your brother be?
Cordelia: Look, Kyle, I understand why you did what you did, if you let me go then I’ll be on your side, and you won’t get in trouble. I’ll help your brother. Just don’t let Bruce do what he wants to do.
Bruce: Shut up you little slut. Don’t listen to her Kyle; I’m your only chance to getting your brother out.
Cordelia: This is not the way Kyle, you are better than this.

heros

a hero can mean so many different things to so many different people. i don't know why some people look up to the people that they do, i think that hero is a term that is used to broadly, but everyone has a right to their own opinions. . . . some people just shouldn't voice theirs sometimes! haha
A hero has many different meanings to a lot of people. The term hero is sometimes only thought of as dealing with the supernatural such as superman, Spiderman, and so on. Others may contribute the title to a person who does a miraculous act whether it’s for selfish or selfless reasons. I personally think that for a person to deserve the term hero they need to have redeeming qualities and to do something that truly betters the lives of others, regardless of if their motives are selfish or not.
Social workers sometimes get a bad reputation as just people who shuffle kids through “the system”. I am sure that this does happen often, that doesn’t mean that every social worker is like that. I have two adopted little brothers, and we have had a lot of foster children stay with us for a little while, so I have some experience with social workers. Some of them truly care about the children they are protecting. Social workers have to see a lot in their line of work, not many people are able to deal with it all without becoming desensitized. There are the social workers who follow through with each child and who try to make sure that where they place the child is the best that it can be. A person who can go through all of that, see the horrors of what some children have to go through, and still be a compassionate person is a hero to me.
A person who goes through a great trial and pain, but doesn’t let it keep them down is pretty amazing. Some people let those experiences alter their personality for the worse, and they use it as an excuse about why they are doing these bad things. The amazing person will learn, and grow from it, and move on. They will use it as a reason to be better. When someone can go through anything traumatic and move on and be a better person there is something unique and spectacular about that person.
The soldiers who are out on the battle field, risking their lives for us deserve our respect and admiration. The soldiers may all have very diverse reasons as to why they are there serving their country, but nevertheless, they are there. They could be there for the glory, for their families, or because it’s a family tradition. No matter what brought them there, they are still risking their lives so that Unites States citizens can have freedom. That is pretty heroic.
There are countless stories that are told about everyday, normal people doing heroic and miraculous things. Everyone has that potential inside of them; they just need to realize it. Hope is a grand thing that gives us a reason to go on life. Heroes' bring that hope into our lives by telling us that there are people out there who do care and who will be there to help us up when we fall.
Heroes inspire and motivate people to do better than they already are. Heroes (whatever their own motives) are individuals that people look up to as a standard of what they should all be striving for. Everyone needs someone as an example of what they should be. Idols and heroes are sometimes mixed up to be the same thing. A hero changes the life or lives of someone(s) in a significant way. Every single person has the potential to be a hero.

my mom

i was missing my mom the other day so i decided to write a poem about her. i finally got online and so now i'm just gonna post what i've been writing.

The one who is always there for me.
The one who holds me when I cry.
The one who tells me everything will be ok.
The one who can always make me laugh.
The one who makes me feel safe and loved.
The one who listens to everything I have to say.
The one who never judges me, or my opinions.
The one who has been there for me through out it all.
The one who that teaches me right from wrong.
The one who has taught me everything I know.
The one that shows me the way.
The one who picks me up when I fall.
The one who never stops believing in me,
Especially when I don’t believe in myself.
The one who loves me when I don’t love myself.
The one who loves me even when I’m being stupid.
The one who always forgives me.
The one who helps me become better and better every day
The one who has been my best friend my whole life.
The one who I look up to and admire.
The one who would give up anything for me.
The one who will never hurt me. The one who accepts me as I am.
The one that knows me better than I know myself.
The one who loves me the whole world over, and who I love more.
The one and only who has my whole heart.
The one and only that I call MOM.

ying and yang

i heard a couple of kids sitting on some grass arguing about ying and yang, the prescence of evil vs. presence of good and it got me thinking. i wanted to write about it, but i really didn't know how to, so i decided to attack it in report form. it worked, i was able to categorize my ideas a lot better.
Ying and Yang is the presence of good and evil, and this concept is true in all aspects of life. Even in nature the presence of ying and yang is present. If you look into anything you can find something good or bad about it. The optimistic person can find good in any thing they focus on. Same is true for the pessimistic person, they can find something negative in anything. All around me in my life the presence of ying and yang is very apparent.
Ying and yang makes my life a lot easier to comprehend. When I understand that there is something good in everything, then it makes life a lot brighter and hopeful. Even in a bad situation there is something good that may come of it. All we have to do is look for the good in life. In school, there are some days when nothing is really going right, or there are a lot of tests that I don’t want to have to take. I could just look at that and think about how horrible a day it is or I can realize that what I am learning is preparing me for the future, and the tests will help my processing skills and test my ability to retain information.
There are days at work when my parents are completely ornery and I really just don’t want to be there to have to deal with all of the problems. When I think about how it is helping me have patience and that it is teaching me that no job is perfect, but that I just have to stick it out, that it will get better is really going to benefit me when I get a new job. We can always learn from every experience. It just depends on us if what we learn is good or bad. A bad day at work could teach me that it is justified to want to quit so I might as well, or it can teach me the pride in sticking it out and doing the best I can even though I’m not being appreciated.
Ying and yang is in us as well. I think that I am a good person who doesn’t do anything seriously bad. There is that evil presence in me called depression that makes it hard to always do the best I can. That evil part of me could easily take over if I let it, but the good part of me will never let that happen. There will always be a battle waging between good and evil, it is only when they work somewhat together that our lives move smoothly.
Cloudy and gray days are somewhat depressing, and most people would rather we didn’t have cold and windy days. With out those cold and windy days then we wouldn’t appreciate the bright and sunshiny days. Same goes for good and evil; we don’t fully appreciate the good with out knowing of evil. We are more grateful for what we have when we have had to do with out.
Being sick is terrible and no one ever likes being sick, but if we were never sick then how would we know what being healthy really feels like? I always appreciate being healthy more after I have just been sick. It is the same with everything else. The bad in the good makes us appreciate the good all the more. I am grateful for the presence of ying and yang in my life. With out ying and yang our lives would be very different from the lives that we know today.
How often do we stop to think about being grateful for something as simple as a bright, cloudless day; the simplicity of a childs' game, or the simple pleasure of a cold drink on a hot day? Ying and yang make life a lot more enjoyable. Understanding allows acceptance, the acceptance of the concept ying and yang goes a long ways to making a happy life.

hello dolly

“Hello, Dolly!” Great Grandpa Jay would call out to me when I would run to give him a hug. I know he called all of his granddaughters Dolly, but he said it in a way that made me feel like it was just for me. He always made me feel like I was someone special, his personal favorite. When I was younger, he would always listen to my stories, play games with me, read to me, and make me feel like I was number one. When I grew up into a young woman, he was the first to treat me like an adult. He still called me Dolly, but I loved the name.
Grandpa Jay was well known around town, he was always helping others and doing whatever he could when he saw a need. He was also known for his big goofy ears. Not only were they big, but he could wiggle them up and down, and if he really concentrated he could make the tips of his ears wiggle so it looked like they were waving at you. All of the grandkids tried to wiggle our ears; we wanted to be exactly like Grandpa Jay. I was so proud of myself when I was able to do it; not many of us were. When we would get together he would wiggle his ears at us and I would be able to wiggle mine right back at him. My ear wiggling wasn’t as impressive as his, but then again my ears aren’t anywhere near as big as his!
He was the type of guy who was larger than life, constantly happy and in a good mood. He would have some joke to tell us or some funny story to share and was always on the look out for funny little toys. So caring and interested in what was going on in my life, Grandpa Jay always made me feel loved. Visiting with Grandpa could cheer up anyone. Everyone really loved my Grandpa.
Saying good bye is a part of life, and saying goodbye to Grandpa Jay was one of the hardest parts of mine. He was ninety-three when he passed away. Being so old I should have been expecting it, but he was such a vibrant, exuberant man that he never seemed old. It was his time to go, which made saying goodbye a little easier.
One of my biggest hero’s is Grandpa Jay. He was always so kind, inventive, helpful, and funny. Even near death he was trying to make us happy. He was such a great example to me, I have always looked up and admired him. His outlook on life was always hopeful and sunny. Being around him I couldn’t help but feel the same way.
Life with out Grandpa Jay isn’t quite as bright. I miss hearing him calling me “Hello Dolly”. The little things that he would do are what make me miss him so much. We would always have Christmas breakfast and read the comics together. When I was little he would read to me, and as he grew older I would read to him. The first Christmas we had with out him was really hard. Looking back at our memories, I feel like he is with me again. Whenever I miss him I think back to all of the times we spent together. If I try hard enough, I can almost hear his voice saying “Hello Dolly”.

blank dialogue

Two roommates Lindsay and McKel are trying to get along together. Lindsay is 5’8”, slender, medium length brown hair, and slightly shy. Lindsay comes from a big family so she is used to doing everything with someone. McKel is 5’6” with short dirty blonde hair, very outgoing, and she is chubby. Being an only child McKel is used to doing things alone and doing them her own way. Their differences make these two roommates good friends, but it also makes them clash at times. After being out alone all night, McKel comes back to their apartment. Lindsay is in her room that is decorated in blue and brown accents. McKel goes into Lindsay’s room to talk and let Linz know she is home safe. Lindsay isn’t too happy with McKel for being out alone so long.

“Where have you been?” Lindsay asks McKel while checking to see what time it is.

“Out.” Is all the response that McKel can gather enough energy for.

“Out?” Lindsay asks McKel.

“That’s right.” McKel says while fixing her hair.

“I thought we talked about this kind of thing. . .” Linz slowly responds.”

“We have.”

“And?”

“I don’t know what you’re getting at.” McKel says confusedly.

“I’m just trying to figure out what happened.”

McKel paused for a moment, then said, “Go ahead”.

“That doesn’t help. You said you would help at least—“

“Sure.”

“Ok, that’s what I’m talking about!” Lindsay exclaims.

McKel quickly evaded with her reply, “What’s what you’re talking about?” looking anywhere but at Lindsay.

“That I just can’t deal with this kind of—“

McKel is feeling very uncomfortable at this point and just wants to stop talking about it. So she tries to end the conversation by saying, “Forget it”.

In a tone of exasperation and disbelief Lindsay curtly asks “What?”

In a tone of complete monotone McKel replies “Forget it.”

“Nothing. I’m leaving.” Lindsay turns to walk away when McKel tries to reach out to give Lindsay a comforting hug. “Don’t.” Lindsay warns McKel.

“Well. . .” McKel wraps her arms around herself, “Just don’t leave.”

With a look of determination Lindsay replies “No.”

“No?” McKel looks forlornly as Lindsay walks out of the apartment.

Watching Lindsay walk out of the apartment McKel realizes that the way she has been acting isn’t acceptable and it isn’t fair to her roommate. She wipes the silent tears that had begun to fall down her face, and slowly trudges into her room. She doesn’t know what to do or how to fix her relationship with her good friend. Instead of going after Lindsay or trying to fix the problem she decides to go out alone to a party instead.